A friend of mine recently wrote to me with a concern about the Protopiac concept (I recommend reading Part 2 of Part II of Anti-Anti-Utopianism before continuing).
CONCERN: "I maybe have 200 friends, which means 2 get in. This makes me sad."
MY ANSWER: You're right. It is sad. Here are some reason why it's sad... and then, some reasons why it's necessary... and after that, some reasons why it's not sad.
Reason #1: Make new, better friends.
Ok, I know you hate this reason. You have friendships that are steeped in shared histories and experiences. They transcend political and religious polarities. You love your friends, because they are more than just friends. They are (almost) family.
And you're right - especially if you are one of the #blessed who have such relationships. I can try to suggest that these relationships have been showing cracks and aren't what they used to be; that you've grown apart; that Johnny can perhaps be just too much of an asshole; that Jenny's being an anti-vaxxer has crossed the line; that Chris is a shitty father, but insists on just having more kids; that Stephanie might not actually like you; and Sunil wouldn't show up to bail you out. But I won't. Because I don't know any of these things. And because it would be mean and hurtful.
Arguably, the most valuable attribute of old friends is that they understand and accept you as you are. This often feels true. In reality, it sometimes is true. Sometimes.
Meanwhile, if you embark on a great project and surround yourself by motivated and engaged individuals devoted to the same cause, you are very likely to make fast new friends. There will be the trials and tribulations to strengthen these new friendships with scar tissue. There will be late nights and shared laughs. There will be new minds to engage with and explore.
So, when you lament your 200, I say: "Cheers to 400!"
Reason #2: Great Accomplishments Require Focused Groups As a Protopiac, you choose to design/build something new, something great. Most of your 200 friends will not help you. They'll text you back if you send a funny GIF. They'll make an intro, if you need an intro. They might give you feedback on something they know a lot about. But they will not design/build with you. Protopiacs will design/build with you. You need a group of productive and motivated Protopiacs to share a mission and vision with. These people will be ready to work and sacrifice for your life's project. This group is your only chance at a scaled success. Think back on the great accomplishments of the past. Groups of scientists. Groups of developers. Groups of Puritan Pilgrims. Your Protopia will need a group of Protopiacs. This may mean that there will be less time for your 200 friends. This will also mean - if you choose the Protopiac Way - that your life will have great meaning and fulfillment.
Sounds culty, does it?
Reason #3: You Have No Other Choice (The Apocalypse Reason) Let's say a decade or two pass and the oft quoted "dumpster fire" 2020 is in hindsight looking more like a balmy living room hearth. The city you love is no longer safe. The bars are dangerous, the museums defunct, the theaters closed. The dystopia has devolved so that you can take none of the things for granted that you do today. What are your friends doing? Your friends are fighting tooth and nail for their spot in a gated community for the Rich. Or the Catholics. Or the Scientologists. Perhaps it's better to be prepared. Perhaps it's better to design/build a Protopia for yourself, your kin, and for some of your friends. Perhaps it's time to be the little pig that makes it through the winter. Not just makes it through the winter, but thrives through the winter.
Reason #4: Weekends and Holidays Whoever said that you lose your 200 friends? They don't disappear. You can write to them, call them, visit them, meet with them, travel with them, party with them, dine with them, etc. You might have less time, because you will be devoted to something too exciting to step away from. But that is a problem that I can wholeheartedly wish upon you.
In fact, perhaps with you being the outsider thinker that you are, you have attracted more than two Protopiac friends over the years.
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